Monday, May 17, 2010

Judgement Whore's New Glass

Wow.  I just read this chick's post:
Loquats and a Kid Breakfast
and someone left this chick a 4 page note scrutinizing her mothering skills:
The Blame Game

True, "it takes one to know one" and I, my friends, have been one.  A.Judgement.Whore.  I have been that ugly, insecure, angry girl who is judging EVERYONE and EVERYTHING around me,  Around you.  Probably even you!  Definitely even myself!  Please accept my apology.

I used to say it's fine to say what you think as long as you can and will say it to the person's face.  You know what, not anymore.  Who cares?!  Who or what made me worthy of judging you or anyone else or anything for that matter.  The sense of entitlement I justified being a *royal biotch* with is ovah!  I am disgusted with who I was.  Crap.  Done with that!  I'm not going to say "it" to you because there will be nothing judgmental to say.  I don't even want to think those thoughts.

I think I hated parts of myself so much (and kinda rightfully so) that when the uglinesses came to light, I was so hard on myself (because I was ashamed) I felt justified being as hard (judgmental) on others- even complete strangers!  This is truly horrible!  There are at least 2 sides to every story.  It can be more difficult to vocalize something positive rather than negative about someone but I even want to stay away from that.  I don't want to judge the situation either way.  Don'!  I avoided that career, you know?!

I'd like to think of myself as becoming the kind of person, friend, and mom who can let whatever will be just be (so long as your life won't be in danger!)  Man, there's so much more energy available for simply living and loving and enjoying life!  Some things just are, and I won't understand, and I don't need to understand.  Just gotta love.

Que Sera *Syrah*  ;)

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